Tuesday, 15 August 2017

A letter to Squidge

Squidge at Tredegar House on his 2nd birthday

I'm sitting here in the lounge, sewing in the ends of a crochet blanket I've made for you to keep at Nanny & Grandad's. Tomorrow marks a new chapter in all our lives, I'm going to hospital to be induced to have your little brother (unless he arrives before then!). He might not arrive for a couple days, but tonight marks the last night we'll spend in this house as a family of three, and I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by that.

Squidge sleeping in his cot

A little shy of 3 years ago, on the 6th October, you arrived in our lives. This beautiful little boy. We couldn't possibly prepare ourselves for how much love we'd feel for you. You became our everything, and still are. You're the reason we go to work, the reason we try to be better all the time, it's all for you and it's about to be all for you and your little brother.

Squidge blowing bubbles

We've spent many, many sleepless nights looking after you, and I'm sure we'll continue to, especially after your little brother arrives, as I have no doubt his night-time cries will wake you up. I've absolutely loved the last 3 years of having you in our lives, I have no regrets other than wishing we'd had you earlier, so you could have been in our lives for longer.

Squidge eating his breakfast

We've shared so many precious moments together, pure fits of giggles, cuddles, comfort when you're upset, comfort when I've been upset, cuddles & cwtches, tickles and many many snuggles. That's not going to change :)

Squidge with Grandad Roddy

Daddy and I are so proud of you, so proud of every little achievement you do, of what a lovely little boy you are. I'll always have a special place in my heart for you. But things are about to change, I'm going to need to spend a lot of time with your little brother while he's so small and new and I already feel guilty about that, I hope as you grow older you understand and I hope by having your little brother, we're giving you a best friend for life.

Squidge sleeping

We love you more than you could ever know, and we can't wait to see you grow to be a big brother. Your little brother is going to love you so much, and I can't wait to share our journey together on here.

Thursday, 10 August 2017

Pregnancy roundup | Weeks 36-40

40 week bump pic

Well, here we are. I'm 40 weeks pregnant! Not something I reached with Squidge, by this point he was a week old after being induced. Earlier on in the pregnancy I was convinced I'd go early, but alas we're sat here and Dot is still snuggled up in my belly.

Getting about

I'm definitely finding things more difficult, there's a lot of low pressure and pain, so walking isn't easy. Today (yesterday by the time you read this) I walked down to the salon to get my nails done all ready for Dot's arrival, and the walk there and back was tough, it's only 10-15 mins, but at full term it's taking it's toll.


Homemade chinese noodles

Throughout the pregnancy I've had no appetite at all really. A couple mouthfuls of my dinner and I'd be done. But in the last 3ish weeks, my appetite has returned and the nausea that's plagued the whole pregnancy seems to have gone, yay! The biggest annoyance is that if I eat a decent meal at night, I'll be up all night with acid reflux, so I'm learning to be careful with the evenings! 

Weight gain?

At last check I'd only gained about 8lbs so far this pregnancy, so the baby/amniotic fluid/placenta/extra blood etc will all account for that, so looks like I've stayed neutral, which is great.

Hospital visits?

We've had another one! I went for a midwife appointment last Friday (I was 39 weeks + 2 days) to have a planned sweep (consultant requested). The midwife wasn't happy with my blood pressure, a bit high. Nothing crazy, but highest it's been this pregnancy (138/90). I had trace protein in my wee (nothing unusual there) but when she asked if I'd had headaches, I said yes. Then she asked if I'd seen any floaters in my eyes, and I said yes, I hadn't put it all together, but I'd had them a couple times. She was worried I was developing pre-eclampsia, so called the hospital and had me go in.

Luckily Squidge was in nursery, so childcare was taken care of. I spent about 6 hrs there all together Had bloods done, had my sweep, went on the monitor for ages and had everything re-checked. Everything was absolutely fine and normal, so I got to go home and not be induced, yay!

However, I'm now on day 2 of a headache... it's much milder today, but I'm keeping an eye in case I need to call them up about it. I'm also anaemic, so I've started iron tablets as of a week ago, I won't go into the horrible side effects they give as it's pretty gross, but they're hopefully doing the job, as once Dot arrives, I'll be even more anaemic. The issue with anaemia is you're prone to bleeding, so they wanted to get a handle on it before the baby arrives.


Induction is already booked for next Weds when I reach 41 weeks pregnant. I'm desperately hoping to avoid that, I really want to go naturally. My experience of being induced before was awful and if I can avoid it, I don't want to go through that again (if you want to read my birth story, it's here). So pleased keep everything crossed for me going into labour naturally! I'll keep drinking the raspberry leaf tea :) Maybe I should get a spicy curry too :) 

Wednesday, 9 August 2017

Life after dummies

Squidge with a dummy and sleeping without one

On the 1st July this year, the dummy fairy visited Squidge. We'd been telling him that the time was coming for a while, and explained just what the dummy fairy was. She's this little fairy, just in case you didn't know, who comes and picks up all the dummies from a bag you leave on your bedroom door, and gives them to little babies who need them. If you're good, she might leave you a little present to say thank you.

Well, this happened a little over a month ago.  For a bit of background, if you'd read my previous blog at all (www.mummy-pixie.blogspot.co.uk) then you might realise I was quite anti-dummies. We'd been given a set when Squidge was born, and I was open-minded that we might need to use them at some stage. Well, when he was 9 weeks old, he just couldn't settle, we tried everything. He wasn't breastfed (we tried and tried, he just couldn't do it) so in desperation we tried a dummy, and it worked! However, it did bring it's own host of problems, like him waking up in the night crying for his dummy when it had fallen out (even as recently as 2 months ago at the grand age of 29 months!).

So as far as Squidge was concerned, he'd never really slept without dummies. He got a lot of comfort from them and would ask for them when he was sad, or hurt as well as tired.

We knew the dummy fairy wasn't going to be easy.  

I was in town on the day we'd planned it, so I popped to the Disney store to buy some special presents, I wanted to get him a teddy he could get comfort from in lieu of the dummy. So for our house I bought him a big Mickey Mouse (for his bed), a small Donald Duck (for the car) and a little toy London Bus, just because.

For his grandparents house I bought him a largeish baby Dory for his bed, a small Mickey Mouse for the car, and a black London cab for the toy.

When I came home, I gave him a special Disney bag to collect all his dummies into, we even went out to the car to get the ones that were in there and when he went to bed, he hung the bag on the back of his door. He was amazing about it! He went to sleep absolutely fine - we were expecting 2+ hrs of screaming for dummies, but it didn't happen.  In fact, since that night, he's never asked for a dummy.

When he woke up in the morning, it was early... 5:30. I guess that's what happens when you don't have a dummy to soothe you back to sleep. We checked the bag and he saw the presents, and a thank you note, he was amazed! He loved the presents and wanted to play with them straight away :) 

It's a month later now, he doesn't really play or cuddle with the toys. Instead he's become more clingy with an older teddy that he's had for nearly 2 years, a little lamb from Waitrose (Easter collection) called Baa Baa. He adores Baa Baa, it's the cutest thing seeing him cwtch it right up :) 

He's been an absolute angel in the car too without them, and happily sits there. He definitely chats away more now too :) 

The biggest issue we've had, is him learning to go to sleep at night without them, he doesn't generally fall asleep anywhere near as quickly now. We're back to bed time taking a good hour or so for him to get to sleep. And, the bigger issue - he's dropped his day naps. Unless you're out driving and he's proper shattered, he won't nap in the day at all, so he gets pretty grouchy and screamy in the afternoons as he's so tired. But it's a small price to pay.

I have so much admiration for him in how grown up he's been about it, and how well he's accepted and dealt with it. He's just taken it in his stride and accepted it. Daddy and I have a bit of guilt about the whole 'dummy fairy' story, the fact that it's all a lie, but we also know it helped him accept losing his dummies. I just hope when he's older and finds out the truth he doesn't hate us too much for it.

Thursday, 3 August 2017

What's in the baby's hospital bag

Baby change bag

I've been meaning to write this post for a little while, but in all honesty, at 39 weeks pregnant (as of yesterday, whoop!) only now is his bag complete... leaving it late, I know!

This is going to be a pretty picture heavy post, I'm going to try and group things together as best I can so it's a bit easier to read :) 

Baby's bottom

Pampers newborn nappies, Asda Little Angels wipes and nappy bags

Sudocrem for sore bottoms

As you might expect, there's a bunch of nappies - this time we're going straight for Pampers. With Squidge we rocked Aldi's nappies for the first few months, but as he grew we found he was leaking all the time and switched to pampers - they were so much softer too. To go with them we have Asda's Little Angels nappy bags and wipes (I love these wipes, they're great quality and love that they come with a lid). No 'bottom care' would also be complete without a tube or tub of Sudocrem* - something we still use regularly with Squidge, we call it magic cream :)

Blankets & teddy's

Cover blanket from mothercare

Crocheted 12 pointed star blanket

Jellycat teddy and a crocheted octopus

As much as I've crocheted a lot of blankets for Dot, I'm only taking one to the hospital with me, it's a 12-pointed star blanket I made. I'm also taking a bigger blanket to put over us if and when I manage to breastfeed. I'm keeping everything crossed that we'll be able to this time, I'm determined!

The top blanket I bought from Mothercare, it's mint coloured on the one side, and grey on the other. The teddy's on the other hand, one (the octopus) I crocheted for him a few months ago, and the bunny is his first Jellycat :) I bought Squidge quite a few Jellycat toys before he was born, so had to get one for Dot too.


Baby clothes
Little Bird muslins

Ok muslins aren't technically clothing, but I thought I'd put them here anyway :) I love these, I love how colourful they are - that's something I'm doing differently this time, opting for really colourful muslins. These ones are from Mothercare from the Jools Oliver Little Bird range (one of my favourite baby clothing ranges).

The sleepsuits, awwww. I've packed 5 sets. Each sleepsuit has folded inside it a vest, and 3 of them (the 3 on the right) also have a baby hat folded inside. There's actually an order to these. The one on the far right will be the first set he wears - it was the first baby clothing I bought him, and it's from Boots. And the one on the far left is the one I want to bring him home in, it was my favourite babygrow/sleepsuit Squidge used to wear, I can't wait to give Dot lots of cuddles in it :)

Other bits and bobs (some of these should probably be in my bag, I might switch them over!)

Cord tie - totoro

Lansinoh nipple cream

Lansinoh nursing pads

I've also ordered a totoro cord tie to use this time instead of the plastic clamp - from everything I've read, they should help the cord dry out faster (typically 3-5 days) and are more comfortable for both mother and baby, especially when it comes to breastfeeding.

I've also got some Lansinoh* nipple cream - I've already been having some sore nipples and the baby isn't even born yet, so I'm hoping this will really help once he's here. They've also sent me some little packs of nursing pads, which is great, I remember I leaked a lot with Squidge, so these will be very handy!

And that's it! That's all that's in the bag, I say *all*, I couldn't fit anything else in if I tried! I might also do a post of what's in my bag, but I'm not sure that'll be as interesting, so maybe let me know in the comments if you'd like to see that :)
Follow me on Bloglovin | Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest
*Post contains some PR samples

Tuesday, 1 August 2017

Pregnancy roundup | Weeks 32-36

Pregnancy update banner

First off, sorry it's been a while since my last update, life has been busy, and eventful! As I'm writing this, I'm actually 1 day off being 39 weeks pregnant, so hopefully they next update will be on time and soon.

Big things have happened!

Since the last update, I've officially gone on maternity leave, I went off at 34 weeks - although, technically I'm still on annual leave, until tomorrow that is, then my maternity leave officially starts. At 35/36 weeks pregnant, I also spent a couple days in hospital on a drip for being dehydrated... more on that in a bit. We've come pretty close to being ready for the baby, only to feel like I'm totally unprepared again, more on that later too!

Maternity leave

We have a new routine, and it's pretty great! Squidge used to go to Nanny & Grandad's Mon-Thurs for the days I worked. Now I'm on leave, he's with me on Monday, Nanny & Grandad on Tues & Weds, me again on Thursday and then a full day in Nursery on a Friday. So far, I've spent almost all my Tues, Weds & Friday's busy with clinic appointments, nail appointments and other appointments. Today is (I think) the first day I've been able to stay at home, not get up early (which is a blessing in disguise as I was up with Squidge a lot last night!) and do what I like, it's great!

I'm planning on taking the full 9 months, but we'll have to see how we do financially, I may have to go back sooner if things are too tight.

Hospital stay
Pictures from my hospital stay

So, scroll back about 2-3 weeks. It's a Friday, I drop Squidge at nursery - one of the staff are delayed in taking him as she's cleaning up some sick. I think nothing of it. In the afternoon I get a call from nursery to say Squidge has been sick. Not alarming to most people, but this was the first time he's thrown up where there hasn't been a reason (like drinking too much too quickly etc). He comes home happy as larry, and when he goes to bed, he's sick again. Thankfully that was the last of it. The next day Daddy and I are off out on our last date night of the year and before the baby comes. We head into town to a lovely Italian restaurant.

We have a lovely meal, and head home about 11pm. I have a bad night, I'm kept awake with some awful heartburn and acid reflux. At about 4:30am hubby wakes up and hears me propped up and breathing heavily, he asks if he can get me anything. I say maybe a glass of water, and almost as a joke I say 'and maybe a sick bucket', quite tongue in cheek.

He pops downstairs (bear in mind, we're staying with our in-laws who are looking after Squidge) and gets me a glass of water. While he's there, I get that dreaded hot saliva in my mouth, I'm surrounded by beautiful white linen and no idea where I could be sick - I knew I wouldn't make it to the bathroom, and I'm not wearing a nighty! With that, thinking I have it under control, I projectile throw up all over the bed, all over myself, absolutely everywhere... hubby walks in the room to spewed up lasagne all over everything. He's frantically trying to save the mattress and starts scooping up the sick with his hands and piling it into nappy bags... he brings me towels, and I go stand in the bath and use the shower head to try and rinse myself off. Just 4 hrs later, hubby is also throwing up and feeling awful, we now think we have food poisoning.

Then the diarrhoea starts and boy is it horrendous... over the next 24ish hours, I'm sick 8 times, and have 17/18 bouts of awful diarrhoea. Now it's Monday morning and 5:30, I haven't been sick since 2pm on Sunday and boom, both happen at the same time... I've been awake most of the night, and haven't felt the baby move. So I call the assessment unit and they ask me to come in, thankfully (and because I could be contagious), I have a room to myself. Thing is, when you go in, you need to do a wee sample, which I couldn't do. I hadn't had a wee in over a day! I managed about half a teaspoon of sample and that was enough for them to see quite a lot of protein and that I was very dehydrated.

They admit me and want me to go on a drip and give me anti-sickness meds through the IV. I manage a poop sample for them too (glamorous I know!). At this point, I'm still convinced I have food poisoning. 

They keep me in overnight, I have 2 drips, one that lasts for 2 hrs, and another that lasts for 6 hrs and slowly I'm able to start having sips of water and get some sleep.

Tuesday afternoon (about 4:30) I'm discharged, and have a scan booked in for the next day to check the baby. They wanted me to stay overnight, but I'm feeling so much better they're happy for me to go. My first set of results of the poop sample come back, and the enzyme for c.diff is present - no salmonella or anything like that, just c.diff... we still have no idea where I could have picked that up... 

Scan of Dot

It's a good week before I start feeling properly better again and I'm not feeling sick after eating/drinking. Hubby is off sick all week too, feeling just as rough. Even my mother-in-law picked up a bit of the bug and had a bad night of it - followed by days of exhaustion. 

What a crazy week that was! The good news is that the baby was fine :) 

Prepared or unprepared?

One thing the hospital stay taught me was that my hospital bag was nowhere near ready! (more on that later this week) This really belongs in the next update... but the other day we got the baby car seat out we used with Squidge, we'd been keeping in the garage. Today I thought I'd check it out and take the covers off to put in the washing machine. However, when I went to do that I realised how filthy it had gotten in the damp garage, and as a result the covers are seriously mouldy - not something I'd want to put a newborn in, even after going through the washing machine. It's also covered in cobwebs and both alive and dead spiders, shudders.

I've contacted the company who make the travel system we have, and as much as they still make it, it's been reimagined since we bought ours, so their new car seats aren't compatible with what we have. So I'm left with the dilemma of whether we do our best to clean up the old one and hope the baby doesn't arrive for a couple days, or order a replacement and again, hope the baby doesn't arrive before the car seat... 

I now wish I'd just gotten rid of the old travel system and bought a new one, we wouldn't be facing this issue :( 

How have I been?

It's been a hard few weeks. I've been having a lot of sleepless nights being kept away with acid reflux. If you're not sure what that is, basically I'm asleep, on my left side (the good side) and I'll be woken up by a mouthful of stomach acid and some sick in my mouth. I'll cough my lungs up, take a rennie and have to sit up for sometimes hours, waiting for it to ease off. When that's not keeping me awake I'm waking up with awful heartburn and the need to have 3 wee's a night.  In the day, I'm also heartburn crazy. My lower back is super achy, and there's a lot of very low down pain from the pressure of the baby. Also getting daily tightnings/braxton hicks, mostly in the evenings. Generally I'm just really tired and achy, it's definitely taking it's toll on my body more this time around!

I do have a sweep booked for this Friday - they're keen for me to go naturally and avoid induction (which I am too!). Induction is provisionally booked for when I'm 41 weeks, so my sweeps are starting from 39 weeks and 2 days. We'll see!
© pixie does | All rights reserved.
Blogger Template Developed by pipdig